Another way we were disciplined was to spend four hours in
the crow's nest. The crow's nest is a small bucket-like
structure that is the highest point on the ship. It was reached
by climbing up a small narrow ladder. I had to go to the crow's
nest on two occasions. One time, I was so distraught, I had
thoughts of letting go of the ladder and hurling myself to the
ground, even though I had no prior history of being suicidal
and have had no history of being suicidal since leaving the
group.
The complete affidavit is available
here.